We seem to be on auto pilot lately.
I have been good since my serious punishment a few weeks ago.
Since I am staying out of trouble it seems like Daddy has kinda pushed DD to the back burner.
This is very frustrating to me, even more so when I am out here on my own and really need to feel that he is taking care of me from afar.
He has not told me to wear any reminders since I left unless I ask if I should, and it's been the same answer every time, "yeah wear your balls I guess."
All this does is make me more frustrated, like if I am behaving, then I don't get the structure I need to help me feel safe, secure and content.
It also seems like I am now the one responsible for disciplining myself, reminding myself of his ownership?!?
I can do all that without DD and honestly without him or his help, which is what I am doing now.
Normally this complacency leads to a big fight and the outcome is normally not good for me.
This time, I am just going to do what I need to do in order to manage things on my own and try my hardest not to act out because of his lack of focus on me.
I don't understand why this happens, why when DD works and the better I behave, that it is let go and set aside as though it's not all that important.
I have been good since my serious punishment a few weeks ago.
Since I am staying out of trouble it seems like Daddy has kinda pushed DD to the back burner.
This is very frustrating to me, even more so when I am out here on my own and really need to feel that he is taking care of me from afar.
He has not told me to wear any reminders since I left unless I ask if I should, and it's been the same answer every time, "yeah wear your balls I guess."
All this does is make me more frustrated, like if I am behaving, then I don't get the structure I need to help me feel safe, secure and content.
It also seems like I am now the one responsible for disciplining myself, reminding myself of his ownership?!?
I can do all that without DD and honestly without him or his help, which is what I am doing now.
Normally this complacency leads to a big fight and the outcome is normally not good for me.
This time, I am just going to do what I need to do in order to manage things on my own and try my hardest not to act out because of his lack of focus on me.
I don't understand why this happens, why when DD works and the better I behave, that it is let go and set aside as though it's not all that important.